On Wednesday, June 24th, shocking evidence was released revealing that a baby had somehow risen through the American military ranks and become a general.
Stanley McChrystal was relieved of his duties as top U.S. commander in Afghanistan after he had a temper tantrum during an
interview with Rolling Stone thus revealing the truth that he is, in fact, actually a baby. During the interview, McChrystal's aides indicated that he had his feelings hurt when Obama had not memorized his service record upon their first meeting and that VP Joe Biden was referred to by the nickname "Bite Me" in the General's inner-circle. Oooooh, zing!
Other reports indicate that the military's top brass should have known McChrystal was a baby much earlier. In late 2009, records show that McChrystal ordered three copies of
"The Wiggles" on DVD to show to his troops, and several officers have anonymously come forward stating that they had walked in on McChrystal breastfeeding. When asked what he would do now that he has been relieved of his command, McChrystal screamed, "I want to be a cowboy astronaut!" Good choice.
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very good point, Andrew. Given that Obama is often a preacher of bipartisanship, it's no surprise his reason for the dismissal of General McChrystal was that he "will not tolerate division." Cute pic.
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